Back in May, the week after I finished the spring semester of teaching, I saw my chance to do something fun and ran with it. The result: I spent a week doing activities in my discomfort zone.
These were activities outside MY comfort zone – there may be some that wouldn’t be difficult for you at all. And with time and practice, they’d probably get better for me as well. But the biggest hurdle is always getting past that initial anxiety and avoidance.
There are plenty of things that might make you uncomfortable that don’t bother me one bit – picking up insects and spiders, taking tests (I love tests!), public speaking, etc. But the purpose of this was to broaden my horizons, so I went with my own personal list of things that I’ve been wanting to do for a while but at the same time have actively avoided.
Activity 1: Bike the Entire 50+ Mile The Loop in Tucson
My first activity was to bike around the entirety of The Loop. My house is actually less than a mile from the path, but my experience was limited to a 10-mile section. That’s the part I bike on regularly to get groceries or visit friends. In the back of my mind I knew I wanted to go all the way around and see the whole path. But I had been telling myself I needed to do more training before trying it.
While I bike to work and back most days, I rarely exceed about 10 miles per day on the bike. On top of that, my bike is not one of those sleek, lightweight road bikes that’s build for a long ride. So biking about 55 miles around all of Tucson was quite the physical challenge. Especially in May when it starts getting hot here!
I took it slow and gave myself lots of water and rest breaks, but even still I was struggling the last hour or so of what ended up being a 4.5 hour outing. By then it was also well above 90F, even though I started pretty early.
While there were some incredible views of the desert and mountains, the best part of the ride was all the time I had to just think. I don’t listen to music when I exercise, which allows me to turn my thoughts inward and do some pretty deep reflection. You know, the type that we usually avoid by always having background noise or social media or friends around. My instinct is to avoid the silence, but when I accept it, it almost always turns out to be exactly what I need.
One of the many art installations along the bike path.
The palo verdes were in full bloom!
I made it!
Activity 2: Shop at an Outlet Mall
This is probably the hardest to explain. I don’t really know why clothes shopping is so uncomfortable for me, but it is – I hate it. I avoid it as much as possible, only buying clothes when my old ones are unwearable. Exhibit A: my jeans (yes, I only have one pair of jeans) just developed holes two inches below the crotch. I’ll probably wear them for another month or two before replacing them with the same brand/style, which I’ll buy online.
Shopping makes me uncomfortable, but shopping at an outlet mall compounds the problem. I’ve been before, but never alone. I typically go shopping with a friend who is good at fashion, and who will pick out clothes for me to try on then tell me which ones to buy. I’ve never been the decision maker.
But that means finding a friend willing to help me and having to shop on their schedule. So I needed to try shopping on my own.
I spent a couple hours there and ended up spending about $250 total. I was exhausted afterwards. While I’d like to do most of the activities on this list more often, I’m hoping I don’t need to repeat this one for another year or two. Hopefully I remembered to get everything I needed! Except jeans… dammit.
At the outlets.
Activity 3: Try Salsa Dancing
I’ve always been envious of confident dancers. I don’t drink much, but when I do it’s because I am going to try to dance and I need all the help I can get. Dancing just feels so awkward for me. I’m used to being one of the best at anything physical, and to having a ton of control over my body as an athlete. When I dance I’m definitely not the best and my body doesn’t automatically do what I want it to do. I’m not used to either of those things.
Which makes it a perfect discomfort zone activity! I’d love to be more confident with dancing, and with a bit of work, eventually actually be good at it!
My excuses are typically that I’m tired or that I don’t have anybody to go with. These are true – I am usually tired at night and most of my friends have kids or other commitments that mean they can’t go out late to dance. But, while the excuses are true, there’s always another way. In this case, the solution was to take a nap, then go alone. Alone! Eek.
It turned out fine. As expected, I am not very good at salsa. At least not yet. I did have a few margaritas to help loosen me up. But I danced for a few hours, nobody laughed at me, and some of the guys there very generously offered to help me out. I’ll definitely go back.
No pic of me dancing, but here’s proof I was there!
Activity 4: Go to a Spanish-English Language Exchange
When I decided to put myself in the discomfort zone, I had been doing Spanish lessons on Duolingo for an hour a day for two months. In the past, I’ve done bits and pieces of informal Spanish but nothing formal and nothing consistent (i.e. more than a month at a time with years in between).
I knew that eventually I would need to expand beyond the app and actually practice talking. But I had told myself that I needed more vocabulary and grammar before I would be able to.
In reality, I was just scared. Similar to how dancing is uncomfortable for me because I’m not used to being bad at something physical, learning a language is uncomfortable for me because I’m not used to being the least educated in any particular subject. I’m used to being the one helping others learn – it is my job after all!
It didn’t matter how little Spanish I had – the people at the language exchange were welcoming and patient and kind. It was like speed dating for languages – I cycled through three English learners during the event. In each pairing, we spoke English for seven minutes then Spanish for seven minutes before switching to a new partner.
It was a great way to test what I had learned and also to learn some new phrases. The organizers are students, so there aren’t any more language exchanges till August when UA starts up again, but I definitely be back at that point.
The meet and greet before the event started. I was smiling to hide how nervous I was!
Activity 5: Go Skydiving
I don’t think I need to explain to most people why skydiving is in my discomfort zone. Most of us, even people used to jumping off tall things, feel some sort of anxiety when jumping out of a plane.
For me, though, it runs a bit deeper. I actually used to be pretty scared of heights. When I lived on the 14th floor of a building, I only went on the balcony once or twice. And even then, I crawled on all fours!
Since then, I’ve tried to do things every now and then that help me confront my irrational fear head on. For instance, a few years ago, I went on all the rides on top of the Stratosphere in Las Vegas, including the ride that is essentially a roller coaster off the side of the tower.
Though things like that are really scary, they’ve definitely helped make me more comfortable with heights. And so did skydiving.
I went with Skydive Marana, at the recommendation and encouragement of a friend who is an experienced skydiver. I’m not going to say I wasn’t nervous – I was. But at the same time, I was less nervous on the plane ride than I was when I was driving to the language exchange the previous night and to salsa the night before.
In a funny way, skydiving seemed way less intimidating – I didn’t have to do anything! All I had to do was let Tommy, my tandem partner, hook me up to his chest. He did the rest, including jump from the plane.
This is when it started getting real. Photo courtesy of Samantha Schwann.
Getting ready to take off! Photo courtesy of Samantha Schwann.
Proof I did it 🙂
Reflecting on My Week in the Discomfort Zone
My week in the discomfort zone was an exhilarating week! It was the perfect way to move on from the routine of the spring semester and kick-start a rewarding summer.
The activities helped me remember that I don’t need to be so scared of things that intimidate me. Sure, I may not be comfortable with them, but doing them will make me stronger, more empathetic, and more likely to be ready to face whatever challenge comes along next.
I’ve already thought of several other things I’d like to finally try, but I’m going to keep them to myself for now 🙂 . But please let me know if you have any suggestions!
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